And the powerlessness is not a failure of faith

One diag­no­sis becomes two. The ther­a­py that should have helped, does­n’t. The date night that was sup­posed to bring con­nec­tion was ruined. The bill came the same week the brakes start­ed squeal­ing.

Any of those by them­selves makes you close your eyes, take a deep breath, and exhale slow­ly. The com­bi­na­tion can be debil­i­tat­ing.

Hon­est­ly, I’ve nev­er liked Job, but I’m start­ing to under­stand the val­ue more. Mes­sen­ger after mes­sen­ger, each one still speak­ing as the next arrived. Every­thing he had built dis­man­tled in a sin­gle after­noon. He did not pre­tend the loss­es were small or recov­er­able. He did not pre­tend that he could stop them. He tore his robe, fell to the ground pow­er­less, and lament­ed — hon­est about what was lost and hon­est about Who remained. That’s the only response suf­fi­cient for grief this com­pound­ed.

You don’t need to hold all of it togeth­er. You need to be held.

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Want a sim­ple next step?
Con­sid­er using this guid­ed reflec­tion, which will take a few minutes.The result includes an excerpt from the Siege of the Soul that pre­cise­ly address­es where you are, a truth to pon­der, and a spe­cif­ic prayer. Whether to pro­vide an email address to receive Walk­ing in Lantern Light, is com­plete­ly up to you.

Pray

Try one of these breath prayers

Read

Does God Real­ly Give You More Than You Can Han­dle?

Kept: Notes from a 100-Year Sea­son

Anoth­er per­spec­tive: When God Feels Dis­tant